How to Install a Wood Fence Post

Learn how to set a 4x4 fence post in concrete, gravel, or soil

When you’re building your own fence, all it takes is a few wooden posts to make it super sturdy. Installing the posts might sound a little complicated, but with a bit of elbow grease and our handy guide, it’s actually pretty simple! In this article, we’ll tell you how to plan out your fence, choose your posts, and install them in the ground with concrete, gravel, or soil. If you’re ready to get your fence built, read on!

[Edit]Things You Should Know

• Place batter boards or stakes at your fence ends. Connect the boards with string and place a stake at each post spot to mark your fence outline.
• Use a post hole digger to make holes that are ⅓ the length of the post and 12 inches (30 cm) wide.
• To set a post in gravel or soil, tamp down a 2-3 inch (5-8 cm) layer of gravel and insert the post. Then, add and tamp gravel or soil into the hole until it’s filled.
• To set a post in concrete, tamp down a 4-6 inch (10-15 cm) layer of gravel and insert the post. Brace it with stakes, then shovel concrete into the hole.

[Edit]Steps

[Edit]Getting Your Fence Posts Ready

1. Check the building codes and permits in your city. Before you start digging, make sure your fence follows the guidelines for your city or neighborhood association. Just search for your area’s building department online to find any relevant codes, restrictions, and permits.^[1]
   
   • For example, there might be rules about maximum fence heights and how deep you have to dig the post holes.
2. Call your utility company or 811 to locate utility lines before you dig. To protect yourself and your utilities, ask a utility worker to come to your house and mark all the buried lines. Either call your utility company directly or call the national US dig line at 811. Or, go to your state’s 811 dig website. It typically takes 2 to 3 days for a utility worker to come to your house.^[2]
   
3. Outline the area of your fence with string attached to batter boards. A batter board is a simple marker made out of 2 wooden stakes and a piece of wood attached between them. Make and place a batter board at each end of your fence. If your fence has corners, place them there too. Then, connect the batter boards with string to outline the area of your fence.^[3]
   
   • The string provides a guideline for your posts and ensures that they’re installed straight when you put them in the ground.
   • Using a batter board allows you to move the string across the wood piece to adjust your fence guideline.
   • If you don’t want to make batter boards, just use stakes to mark the corners.
4. Insert a wooden stake at each post location, lining it against the string. Fence posts are typically spaced 5 to 8 feet (1.5-2.4 m) away from each other, though that depends on your city’s regulations and the type of fence you’re building. Just drive a stake into the ground where you’ll install each post. Line the stake flush against the string to ensure all the posts are straight.^[4]
   
5. Choose fence posts made from heartwood or pressure-treated wood. Use wood that stays sturdy in the climate you live in. Both heartwood and pressure-treated wood make durable fence posts, so look up your area’s building guidelines or codes to see what specific lumber they recommend. Regardless of the type of wood you use, only buy lumber that’s labeled as suitable for ground contact.^[5] Unless you live in a desert, choose durable lumber for your posts, like:
   
   • Durable heartwood: Western juniper, black locust, and Osage-orange are excellent lumber choices. Pacific yew, redwood, and most cedar and white oak species often last 20+ years in most conditions.^[6]
   • Pressure-treated wood: choose a variety with about 1 inch (2.5 cm) of sapwood surrounding a core of heartwood. Aspen, ponderosa pine, lodgepole pine, and Douglas fir are great options. Just buy this wood from a trusted source to avoid poorly treated wood.
6. Coat the posts with wood preservative to protect them against moisture. While this step is optional, it helps your wood posts stay sturdy for longer. The sawn-off ends of fence posts are often vulnerable to moisture. If you live in a damp climate or want to take some extra precautions, follow these steps to protect your wood:
   
   • Use a saw or sliding bevel to cut the top of the fence post at a 45º angle, which encourages rain runoff. Or, install post caps on the posts once they’re in the ground.^[7]
   • Treat each end of the wood with a non-water-based, brush-on wood preservative, such as copper naphthenate. Wood preservative is toxic, so follow the safety recommendations on the label when you apply it. Apply multiple coats of the copper naphthenate, letting each coat dry for 24 hours.

[Edit]Setting the Post in Soil or Gravel

1. Use soil or gravel to set your fence post if you have dense soil. Install your posts directly into the soil as long as it's dense and has good drainage. Installation is typically more labor-intensive and a bit less stable than concrete, but it’s often cheaper and makes your wood more resistant to decay.^[8]
   
   • Loamy soil, which has an even mixture of sand, silt, and clay, is generally dense and has good drainage. Soil that is mostly sand or clay tends to have poor drainage.^[9]
   • Dig a hole 12 inches (30 cm) deep and 4-12 inches (10-30 cm) wide to check your soil drainage. Fill the hole with water and wait for it to drain. Then, fill it with water again. Measure the water depth, wait 15 minutes, and measure again. Multiply the measurement by 4 to find how fast the water drains per hour. If it’s less than 1 inch (2.5 cm), your soil has poor drainage.^[10]
   • Due to additional strain, gate posts work better when installed in concrete.
2. Use a post hole digger to dig a hole about ⅓ of the length of your post. For sturdy fence posts, stick to the general rule of burying ⅓ of its length in the ground. For example, if you have an 8-foot (2.4 m) post, make a hole at least 2 feet (0.6 m) deep. When anchoring the post in soil, dig the hole about as wide as the fence post. If you’re anchoring the post in gravel, dig a hole about 8 inches (20 cm) across for a standard 4x4 post.^[11]
   
   
   • If your soil is hard, cut through the sod with a shovel and soak the ground with water.
   • Keep some dirt, or dirt mixed with gravel, nearby to backfill the hole.
3. Pour 2-3 inches (5-8 cm) of gravel into the hole. Adding some pea gravel or crushed stone to the bottom of the hole improves soil drainage. Pour it in then tamp it down flat with your post. It’s especially important to add gravel if your soil has poor drainage.^[12]
   
   
   • Alternatively, use a wooden stick, a broken wood tool handle, or a piece of scrap lumber as your tamping bar.
4. Position the post in the center of the hole. Ask a friend or family member to help you center the post in the hole and get it level and in line with the other posts. Then, get your assistant to hold the post in place. If you’re by yourself, use scrap wood and stakes to stabilize the posts. Drive the stakes into the ground about 2 to 3 feet (61-91 cm) away on two sides of the post. Then, nail one end of the piece of wood to the stake and the other end to the post.^[13]
   
   
   • Make sure the post is flush against the string guideline you made.
   • Measure the distance between your posts to ensure that the top and bottom rails fit.
5. Pour gravel or soil into the hole, tamp it down, and repeat. Crushed stone typically offers better drainage than soil. It can also improve the stability of your posts if it’s well-tamped and installed in dense soil. Whether you’re using crushed stone or soil, shovel it in 3–5 inches (7.5–12.5cm) at a time, tamping well after each batch. Repeat until the hole is filled.^[14]
   
   
   • Before each tamping, hold a level against the post and adjust it if it isn’t level.
   • If you want to plant grass at the base of the post, use soil for the last 2-3 inches (5-8 cm).
6. Make a small hillock with dirt at the base of the post. Build up the soil at the base of the pole to make a small "hill" sloping away from the post in all directions. The spot where the post leaves the ground is the most common location for rot. Good drainage here is extremely important.
   
   

[Edit]Setting the Fence Post with Concrete

1. Set fence posts in concrete when stability is extra important. Whether you’re installing a fence in sandy or muddy soil, or simply want extra stability, go with a concrete setting. The main downside to using concrete is that it can trap water around the post. This sometimes reduces the lifespan of your posts by many years. However, adding a gravel base and an open-bottomed concrete sleeve helps mitigate this issue.^[15]
   
   
   • If you’re adding a gate post, be sure to use concrete.
2. Dig a hole ⅓ as deep and 3 times as wide as the fence post. Use a post hole digger or post driver to make a hole at least ⅓ the length of your post. Then, dig an extra 4 to 6 inches (10-15 cm) for the gravel base. For a typical 4x4 fence post, dig the hole 12 inches (30 cm) wide across, or 3 times the width of the post.^[16]
   
   
   • If you’re digging a lot of post holes, use an auger to make the process faster and easier.
   • If the soil is rocky, using a power tool might be dangerous. Instead, use a clamshell digger to make your holes and a long digging bar to lever out rocks.
   • Make sure the hole is straight and the same width all the whole way down.
3. Add 4 to 6 inches (10-15 cm) of gravel to the bottom of the hole. Adding a base of gravel or crushed stone below the post greatly improves drainage. Pour 4 to 6 inches (10-15 cm) of gravel into the hole and tamp it down with your post or a piece of scrap lumber.^[17]
   
   
4. Brace the post to keep it straight by using 2 stakes and scrap lumber. Position the post in the center of the hole, using a level to ensure it's straight. To hold the post in place, pound 2 stakes into the soil about 2 to 3 feet (61-91 cm) away from the post and on adjacent sides. Nail or screw scrap lumber to the stake and the post to keep the post upright and straight. Don't pound the nails or screw the screws all the way into the post so they’re easy to remove later.^[18]
   
   
5. Dig holes and add braces to each wooden post. To pour the concrete all at once, make every post hole, insert each post in the center, and brace each one using the stakes. Then, ensure the string you tied at each post corner is flush against the other posts. Adjust any posts to make them in line with each other.
   
   
6. Add 1 to 2 more inches (2-5 cm) of gravel inside the post holes. Adding another layer of gravel further improves drainage and the post’s stability. Just tamp the gravel down after you pour it inside.
   
   
7. Mix your concrete in a wheelbarrow. Put on safety glasses and waterproof gloves.^[19] Then, pour a full bag of concrete mix (or as much as you can transport) into your wheelbarrow. Mix in about 90% of the recommended water according to the label. Combine the mix and water together for a few minutes. Check the consistency and slowly add more water until the concrete feels like paste.^[20]
   
   
   • Add the water in small increments to ensure the concrete doesn’t come out too runny. When it’s a good consistency, the concrete falls off of the shovel easily.
   • To save effort, rent a portable concrete mixer or a concrete truck.
   • To save money, make your own concrete mix. Mix together 1 part Portland cement, 2 parts sand, and 3 parts coarse gravel, by volume.^[21]
   • For a quicker solution, use fast-setting concrete. With this type of concrete, you pour the dry mixture into the hole, then add in water. These mixes tend to be weaker and more expensive, so use them with your own caution.^[22]
8. Use a shovel to fill the hole all the way with concrete. Shovel concrete into the hole up to soil level. Work quickly enough to use each batch of concrete before it hardens. Take care not to splash cement onto the post.^[23]
   
   
   • Set a level on top of the post before the concrete dries to ensure it's straight.
9. Use a trowel to slope the concrete at the base of the post. Shovel concrete around the post. Then, smoothly cap off the top of the cement with a trowel, sloping it downwards from the post. Make a slope that’s about ½ inch (1.25 cm) above ground level that drops about 1 inch (2.5 cm) below ground level. This pitch helps the water flow off the post, preventing pools of water at its base that promote rotting and decay.^[24]
   
   
10. Let the concrete cure for at least 3 days. It typically takes several days for the concrete to dry and harden before you’re able to build the fence or put any weight on the post. Read the directions on your concrete mix to see how long you need to wait for it to dry.
    
    
11. Seal the gap between the post and the concrete with caulk. A little gap often forms around the base of the post and the concrete. This gap can widen from natural expansion and frost, which lets water pool around the post and cause rot. Once the concrete is dry, apply a sealant that bonds to concrete and wood, such as some silicone sealants or exterior acrylic latex caulk, over the gap.^[25]
    
    

[Edit]Video

[Edit]Tips

• Install your end or corner posts first. Once they are in place, run a string between them to guide the placement of the additional fence posts. Usually, corner or end posts are bigger than other types of posts and they are built in an “H” bracing design using another post for stability. If the posts are in dirt, set them in the ground deeper than the other posts.
• Give the fence time to lose its natural moisture before you paint it. If it isn’t fully dry, the paint can trap moisture and encourage rot.^[26] Depending on the humidity and how freshly cut the wood is, drying can take up to a few months. Consider using a water-repellent stain, which lasts longer than paint.

[Edit]Warnings

• Most wood slowly warps over time. This is much more noticeable in some species than others.
• Some types of pressure treatments and wood preservatives contain harmful chemicals. Wood treated with chromated copper arsenate (CCA) is the most notorious, but is no longer sold to homeowners in the US or EU. If you are using CCA-treated wood, do not place it where it can contact drinking water or where animals might chew on it. Wear a respirator while sawing it, and do not burn the scrap.^[27]

[Edit]Things You’ll Need

[Edit]Planning Your Fence

• Wooden stakes
• Scrap lumber
• String
• Non-water-based, brush-on wood preservative, optional

[Edit]Setting the Post in Soil or Gravel

• Fence posts
• Post hole digger
• Pea gravel or crushed stone
• Stakes
• Scrap lumber
• Nails
• Soil

[Edit]Setting the Fence Post with Concrete

• Fence posts
• Post hole digger
• Pea gravel or crushed stone
• Stakes
• Scrap lumber
• Nails
• Concrete mix
• Wheelbarrow
• Shovel
• Trowel
• Caulk

[Edit]References

[Edit]Quick Summary

1. ↑ https://www.hebronindiana.org/sites/default/files/fileattachments/building/page/4491/acfrogdzx5ta6sajczjpgnfvhdqkbfwj-xtf5cs_kj_e6jpxk63gd9xdyxavkcj_s8t16olxa6vflvnt_bw_zesntyvk110zpws68bwqeqltqfi8yb5bt9dzo55f91u_85m_p9t8x3xl3loan29f.pdf
2. ↑ https://call811.com/
3. ↑ ​​https://www.lowes.com/pdf/1203_Fence_Installation_Tips_-_Layout_and_Digging_Post_Holes_V5.pdf
4. ↑ ​​https://www.lowes.com/pdf/1203_Fence_Installation_Tips_-_Layout_and_Digging_Post_Holes_V5.pdf
5. ↑ https://extension.uga.edu/publications/detail.html?number=B1192
6. ↑ https://forestry.ca.uky.edu/sites/forestry.ca.uky.edu/files/forfs03_05.pdf
7. ↑ https://www.diydoctor.org.uk/projects/sliding-bevel.htm
8. ↑ https://takeayard.com/fence-post-setting/
9. ↑ ​​https://stormwater.pca.state.mn.us/index.php?title=Soil_physical_properties_and_processes
10. ↑ https://hortnews.extension.iastate.edu/testing-and-improving-soil-drainage
11. ↑ https://takeayard.com/fence-post-setting/
12. ↑ https://www.tractorsupply.com/tsc/cms/life-out-here/garden-home-land/fencing/how-to-set-fence-posts-in-concrete-and-gravel
13. ↑ https://youtu.be/aUTHbArkPu0?t=72
14. ↑ https://www.tractorsupply.com/tsc/cms/life-out-here/garden-home-land/fencing/how-to-set-fence-posts-in-concrete-and-gravel
15. ↑ https://www.tractorsupply.com/tsc/cms/life-out-here/garden-home-land/fencing/how-to-set-fence-posts-in-concrete-and-gravel
16. ↑ [v161645_b01]. 20 November 2020.
17. ↑ https://www.abbottsathome.com/set-wooden-fence-posts-in-concrete/
18. ↑ https://youtu.be/aUTHbArkPu0?t=72
19. ↑ https://todayshomeowner.com/fence/video/how-to-build-a-wood-privacy-fence-in-your-yard/
20. ↑ http://www.motherearthnews.com/diy/garden-yard/installing-concrete-footing-ze0z1401zcov.aspx?PageId=2
21. ↑ http://matse1.matse.illinois.edu/concrete/bm.html
22. ↑ http://www.motherearthnews.com/diy/garden-yard/installing-concrete-footing-ze0z1401zcov.aspx?PageId=2
23. ↑ [v161645_b01]. 20 November 2020.
24. ↑ https://youtu.be/LBUiFbUp4dI?t=41
25. ↑ https://blessmyweeds.com/12-tips-for-maintaining-a-wood-fence/
26. ↑ https://forestry.ca.uky.edu/sites/forestry.ca.uky.edu/files/forfs03_05.pdf
27. ↑ http://www.herinst.org/CCAtimber/regulations/Europe.html

How to Move On

A guide to help you process your emotions, build your confidence, and move on from heartbreak

If you've recently gone through a breakup and are struggling to move on, you're not alone. And while it isn't always easy, anyone can do it with a bit of perseverance and patience. There are no hard and fast rules for moving on, but if you need a little help, you've come to the right place. Treat yourself with kindness, take your time to heal, and use the following guide to move on for good.

[Edit]Things You Should Know

• Give yourself time to process your emotions and allow yourself to feel sad. Talk to somebody you trust and practice self-compassion.
• Get closure by distancing yourself from your ex until you're ready to talk. Identify lessons you’ve learned that you can use in future relationships.
• Keep yourself busy and do things you enjoy to boost your mood. Practice self-care and spend plenty of time with friends while also trying new things.

[Edit]Steps

[Edit]Give yourself permission to feel sad.

1. Accepting and processing your emotions is critical to healing. When you're feeling many negative emotions, it's normal to want to push those feelings down—but that just extends your heartache. Instead, allow yourself to mourn the relationship. Acknowledge what you feel and reassure yourself that your emotions are valid; feeling them is just part of the path to healing.^[1]
   
   • Listen to what your body needs so that you can release your emotions. You might write in a journal, express your feelings through art, exercise, or vent your emotions in a letter you destroy later.
   • Try to separate your raw feelings from the sad or despairing thoughts that might accompany them.
   • For example, your brain might say things like "You'll never find someone else to love you" or "Life will never be the same," but that isn't true. You're sad, and that's valid, but the intrusive thoughts are not.

[Edit]Reflect on the relationship realistically.

1. Idealizing the relationship and your ex makes it harder to move on. Relationships can be funny: once they're over, it's easy to focus only on the good memories and deny anything bad happened. However, that won't help you move on. Recall the struggles and issues as well as the moments of happiness, and you'll remember why breaking up was necessary in the first place.^[2]
   
   • Similarly, it's common to fantasize about an ex post-breakup, creating an illusion that they were perfect when really, they had issues like anyone else. Let go of that illusion and see your ex for who they are, good and bad.
   • Once you can realistically visualize your ex and the relationship, your motivation and resolve to move on will grow steadily stronger.

[Edit]Talk to a trusted confidante.

1. Expressing your emotions is an essential part of processing them. Sit down with a close friend or family member you trust to support and love you no matter what. Talk to someone who is an excellent listener and won't interrupt you; you deserve to feel heard! Tell them everything: what happened, what you're feeling, and anything else you need to express.^[3]
   
   • Choose someone you're comfortable being vulnerable around. You might need to cry, scream, or punch a pillow while you talk—and that's okay.
   • If you can't shake the sadness alone, a therapist or counselor can help you move on. They’ll help you work through your feelings and develop healthy coping mechanisms.

[Edit]Practice self-compassion.

1. Treating yourself compassionately strengthens your resolve to move on. When a relationship ends, it's natural to blame yourself for it—but that's not fair. When a relationship fails, it doesn't make you a failure. Treat yourself with compassion and shut down those critical thoughts. Instead, tell yourself that you didn't fail, you're not at fault, and you can overcome this and move on.^[4]
   
   • Even if you don't believe you can move on, set aside the uncertainty and encourage yourself anyway. Firmly tell yourself, "I can do this. I am moving on," until that statement becomes true.

[Edit]Give yourself time to heal.

1. Moving on takes time, and rushing things will make it harder. There's no definitive timetable for getting over a breakup, so it's up to you to give yourself the time you need. Many people take around 3 months to move on, but that's not a hard rule. Go at your own pace, and don't let anyone else tell you when to move on—it's your heart, and you know yourself best.^[5]
   
   • It can help to give yourself a gentle timeline. For example, you might say, "I need this week just to be sad, but next week, I'm going to start going out with friends and doing fun things again."

[Edit]Imagine the breakup as a tiny blip in your life's journey.

1. Looking at the bigger picture helps put the breakup in perspective. When you're in the middle of a breakup, it can feel like the end of your world—so it helps to remind yourself that’s not true. Take a step back: in reality, this is just a moment in the long arc of your life, and you have a lot more growth to look forward to. Years from now, you won't feel this sadness; it'll just be a memory.^[6]
   
   • This is especially helpful to remember in moments when the sadness makes you feel like you'll never be able to move on. It will pass, and you'll be able to do more than move on—you'll be able to thrive.

[Edit]Stay open to the possibility of new love.

1. Moving on is easier when you have hope for the future. It's a big world, and there's someone out there for you—even if you haven't found them yet. Whether this was your first or fifth relationship, it doesn't have to be your last (or your best). So long as you're open to love and committed to living your best life, the right partner will find you sooner or later.^[7]
   
   • You're also not alone. Many people in the world are in your position, and any of them could be the right match for you.
   • Remind yourself that a fulfilling life doesn't depend on your relationship status. You can find special someone if you want a relationship, but there's more to life than that. You are complete, with or without a partner!

[Edit]Cut contact with your ex and discard mementos.

1. No contact or physical reminders of your ex makes it easier to move on. Processing your emotions is hard when your ex is nearby, so cut off all contact if you can: don't call, text, or hang out with them. Then, unfollow their social media pages and throw away physical reminders of them, like gifts, photos, and mementos. As the saying goes: out of sight, out of mind.^[8]
   
   • It's okay if you can't break contact entirely, but do your best to avoid situations where you know you'll see them.
   • If you don't want to throw everything out, box a few things up and give them to a friend for safekeeping. When you're ready, you can either discard or retrieve the box.
   • Even if you'd like to be friends with your ex, it's best not to force it immediately. Instead, say something like, "You're still important to me, and I want to be friends in the future, but right now, I need some time to process."

[Edit]Talk to your ex for closure when you’re ready.

1. Closure makes it easier to accept and make peace with the breakup. Once you've had time to process your emotions by yourself, ask your ex to discuss the breakup so you can get closure. Prepare questions and thoughts beforehand, so you're prepared for the conversation, and use the opportunity to clear the air with them. Be sure you ask for your ex's side of the story and listen to what they say, too!^[9]
   
   • At the end of the day, it might help to understand your ex's perspective and your own. If nothing else, you'll know where both of you stand—no more uncertainty.
   • It can be disappointing if your ex can't give you a proper answer or won't even sit down to give you closure, but it also means they're not worth your sadness in the first place.

[Edit]Look for patterns in your past relationships.

1. Future relationships will be stronger if you identify unhealthy patterns. Consider your childhood relationships and past breakups: do they have any similarities? Did they end for the same reasons? Chances are, this heartache is rooted in your past. Identify patterns you may have learned earlier in life and work on fixing them as you move on.^[10]
   
   • For instance, you might have trouble communicating because your parents didn't like talking about their feelings. If you learn to communicate with your partner, you can have happier relationships in the future.
   • Furthermore, consider what you’ve learned from this breakup. Breakups are hard, but they can show you much about who you are and what you want from life. Treat them as learning opportunities rather than failures.

[Edit]Forgive yourself and your ex for the breakup.

1. Holding onto grudges and painful emotions will make you feel worse. If your ex hurt you, try to forgive their mistakes and focus on your future instead. Similarly, forgive yourself for your role in the breakup and for investing in a relationship that didn't work out. It’s easier to heal when you’re not still clinging to the anger and sadness of the breakup.^[11]
   
   • Forgiving someone is about your mental health and happiness, not theirs. It doesn't mean that they didn't do anything wrong. It helps you let go of the past and move on.

[Edit]Keep yourself busy.

1. Staying busy means you won’t have time to dwell on the breakup. If you have time to sit and think, you might contemplate the breakup and consequently feel worse. Instead, fill your time with activities and creative projects that get you out of your head, like doing crafts, redecorating, or going out with friends. This will help you feel better as you work through your negative emotions.^[12]
   
   • Invite your best friends to spend time with you, whether you're going out for a night partying on the town or just for a quiet dinner and movie. A thriving support system can help you through hard times.
   • Focus on the benefits of being single! Look for ways to have fun with your friends, assert your independence, and pursue what makes you happy.
   • Push yourself to stay busy, even on days when you feel like staying in bed with a tub of ice cream. You'll feel happier and healthier when you're out and about with people you love.

[Edit]Pamper yourself.

1. Self-care can boost your mood and rebuild your self-confidence. Treat yourself to things that always cheer you up and get you in a better headspace; for example, you could take a luxurious bubble bath, get a massage, play your favorite game, or start an exercise regimen. Practice self-care and do activities that are both healthy and comforting!^[13]
   
   • Remember that self-care doesn't mean eating lots of junk food or doing other unhealthy things. Now is the time to take care of yourself in mind and body.

[Edit]Try new and exciting things.

1. Moving on is the perfect time to turn over a new leaf! Get in touch with yourself, boost your self-esteem, and regain independence by doing new activities and hobbies you've always wanted to try. Pick something you're interested in, take an online class, attend a workshop, enroll in a community college course, or teach yourself how to do it.^[14]
   
   • For example, you might learn to draw, take guitar lessons, start playing tennis, or visit a city you've never seen before.
   • It also helps to develop new interests and hobbies after a breakup because you'll have something you can do without thinking of your ex.

[Edit]Be generous towards others.

1. Connecting with others will make your problems seem less daunting. Whether you volunteer, donate to charity, or engage in small but meaningful acts of kindness, help others when you can. Breakups are a source of sadness, and that sadness can really get you caught up in your own head. Practicing generosity will get you out of your head and feeling great about yourself!
   
   • For example, a simple act of kindness might be thanking the person who bags your groceries, holding the door for someone whose arms are full, or helping someone who needs directions.
   • You can also practice generosity by helping your friends and family members. Tackle a chore they need help with, or simply ask them about their day and how they've been doing.

[Edit]Meet new people.

1. Meeting new friends and love interests will boost your confidence. Put yourself out there and say “hello” to new people, whether you’re at a bar, attending a friend’s party, or using a social networking app. You also don’t have to look for a date; new friends and acquaintances are just as important as potential love interests! The important thing is to put yourself out there and enjoy the adventure.^[15]
   
   • When you start dating again, make sure it's not a rebound. You'll know you're ready when you feel excited about the idea of having a genuine connection with someone.
   • Focus on building connections with people rather than finding love again. Take the time to get to know them before you dive into something serious.

[Edit]References

[Edit]Quick Summary

1. ↑ https://psychcentral.com/blog/how-to-let-go-of-the-past-and-hurt
2. ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/grief/dealing-with-a-breakup-or-divorce.htm
3. ↑ https://psychcentral.com/blog/how-to-let-go-of-the-past-and-hurt
4. ↑ https://psychcentral.com/blog/how-to-let-go-of-the-past-and-hurt
5. ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/grief/dealing-with-a-breakup-or-divorce.htm
6. ↑ https://www.unh.edu/pacs/break-ups-how-help-yourself-move
7. ↑ https://www.unh.edu/pacs/break-ups-how-help-yourself-move
8. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-mindful-self-express/201603/is-your-brain-breakup
9. ↑ https://psychcentral.com/blog/how-to-let-go-of-the-past-and-hurt
10. ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/grief/dealing-with-a-breakup-or-divorce.htm
11. ↑ https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/adult-health/in-depth/forgiveness/art-20047692
12. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-squeaky-wheel/201501/7-mistakes-you-need-avoid-after-breakup
13. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/me-you-us/201408/3-ways-take-care-yourself-after-breakup
14. ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/grief/dealing-with-a-breakup-or-divorce.htm
15. ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/grief/dealing-with-a-breakup-or-divorce.htm

How to Plan for a Long Weekend

You're likely super excited about your upcoming long weekend, and planning what you're going to do is part of the fun! A long weekend is the perfect time to make memories, whether you take a trip or stay home. To get the most out of your weekend, decide what you're going to do before the weekend starts. You deserve time to rest and have fun, so use your time off to something you enjoy.

[Edit]Steps

[Edit]Going on a Weekend Getaway

1. Compare taking a road trip versus taking a flight. Generally, short road trips are the best way to spend a long weekend because they'll allow you to spend more time enjoying your destination. However, you might choose to book a flight if you want to go further from home. Plan a road trip if your destination is 2-3 hours away, but consider flying if you want to travel further from home.^[1]
   
   • Check the cost of plane tickets and the price of gas to figure out how much more expensive it would be to fly. You might be able to find deals for some destinations.
   • A long road trip could work for you if you want to stop in other cities along the way.
   • Talk to your travel companions about what they want to do if you're traveling with others.
2. Plan a trip to visit friends and family in another city. You might be able to have a fun, low-cost weekend getaway by staying with someone you know. Contact your closest friends and family members and ask if they can accommodate you for the weekend. Offer to bring them a host gift or to pay for a group outing in exchange for staying at their home.^[2]
   
   • If you can't stay with family or friends, you can still visit them! Ask if they can meet up for an afternoon or to have dinner, and make sure to get recommendations for things to do while in town.
3. Book a trip if you can afford a hotel and travel costs. Maximize a long weekend by taking a mini-vacation. You might go somewhere exciting, like Las Vegas or New York City, but you could also stay closer to home. Make travel and hotel arrangements ahead of time so you won't have to worry about everything being booked up. Then, enjoy your whirlwind trip.^[3]
   
   • Make the most of a short vacation by leaving as soon as you can on Friday evening and returning as late as possible on Sunday.
4. Travel to a nearby city for a weekend getaway. You don’t need to go far to have fun! Go on a short road trip to a city or town that’s close to home. Both big and small cities will provide a fun change of pace.^[4]
   
   • Pick a major city if there’s one close to you. For instance, visit Chicago, Seattle, Portland, Houston, Austin, New Orleans, Atlanta, Boulder, Miami Beach, Philadelphia, San Diego, San Francisco, or New York.
   • If there aren’t any big cities near you, don’t worry! You can still have fun in another small town. Check out their local eateries, parks, and shops.
5. Look for quirky hotels, restaurants, and activities to enjoy. Many cities and towns boast something unique that will create a memorable experience for you. This might include a funky restaurant, a trendy boutique hotel, or a local landmark, such as a big ball of yarn or a large fire hydrant. Schedule visits to the quirky attractions in the city you choose for your getaway.^[5]
   
   • If you’re staying overnight, focus on boutique hotels that have a unique flavor or pick an Airbnb to experience the city like a local.
   • When eating out, check online to find the hotspot bars and restaurants where you’re going. You might visit a teahouse, food truck park, or fusion restaurant that combines different cuisines.
   • Check the city’s website to find a listing of any special events happening over the weekend. Similarly, learn about the city’s popular attractions, like museums.
   • You can find a list of fun attractions near you here: https://www.onlyinyourstate.com/
6. Schedule activities in advance to maximize your trip. When traveling over a long weekend, it's easy to feel like all you did was arrive and depart. Doing a variety of activities on your getaway will help you feel like you took a full trip. Plan how you'll spend each day and book reservations for your activities, if necessary. Be sure to leave transition time between activities so you don't get behind schedule.^[6]
   
   • For example, your Saturday plans in a beach town might include watching the sunrise over the ocean, eating breakfast at a local cafe, going to a museum, eating lunch at a food truck, swimming in the ocean, eating dinner at a popular seaside restaurant, and watching a movie with your family.
   • Some activities may fill up or sell out over the weekend, so it's best to book things before you go.^[7]
7. Build anticipation by talking about your trip in the days before it. Discussing what you'll do on your trip before you go can help you feel like your trip was longer than it really was. Talk to your family and friends about your travel plans. Additionally, look at photos of the place where you'll be going and read advice from other travelers about how to get the most out of your experiences.^[8]
   
   • Say things like, "I can't wait to hit the slopes this weekend," or "This time tomorrow I'll be relaxing on a beach. I can't wait to feel the sand between my toes."
   • When it comes to finding tips, you might read reviews about a famous restaurant you want to visit to find out when you're less likely to have to wait for a table.
8. Check out a state landmark or historical site for an educational activity. Most areas have an important landmark or site nearby that is open for visitors. Travel to a landmark or historical location to walk the grounds, read the posted facts, and take photos. Invite family and friends to join you so you can all talk about what you learned.^[9]
   
   • For instance, you might visit the Alamo if you’re in Texas, the Statue of Liberty if you’re in New York, Independence Hall if you live near Philadelphia, Mount Rushmore if you’re near South Dakota, or Alcatraz Island if you’re near California.

[Edit]Enjoying the Great Outdoors

1. Go on a hiking or camping trip during cool, clear weather conditions. Spending time outdoors relaxes you and stokes your adventurous spirit. Plan a hike at a local park or nature reserve. If you want to camp overnight, reserve a camping spot, pack your camping gear, and invite others to go with you.^[10]
   
   • If you’re camping, make sure your tent can hold everyone who is coming.
   • If you live in a warm area, spring and fall might be the best time for hiking and camping. In cooler areas, late spring, summer, and early fall might be the best time to go hiking or camping.
2. Hang out at the beach or lake on a warm, sunny weekend. A fun day at the beach can give you instant vacation vibes. If the weather is warm and clear, there’s no better place than the beach or lakeside. Pack up your bathing suit, blankets, towels, and a picnic. Then, enjoy a long day at the beach or lake.^[11]
   
   • You can visit the beach or lake for a day trip or a weekend-long getaway.
3. Visit a state or national park during spring, summer, or fall. National parks allow you to see natural wonders and wildlife up close, so they can give you a once-in-a-lifetime experience. Find the national park that's closest to you. Check the hours for the park and purchase tickets, if necessary. On the day of your visit, wear comfortable clothes and walking shoes to the park and carry drinking water with you.^[12]
   
   • For example, you might visit the Rocky Mountain National Park or Yellowstone National Park.
   • You can find a park near you by visiting here: https://www.nps.gov/findapark/index.htm
4. Take a ski trip in the mountains during snowy breaks. A visit to the mountains lets you enjoy an exhilarating adventure and cuddle by a fire. During cold weather, a trip to the mountains might be your perfect long weekend holiday getaway. Book a short stay at a mountain lodge or ski resort, then spend your free time on the slopes.^[13]
   
   • For instance, you might spend your weekend in Aspen, CO, Bend, OR, or Whistler, British Columbia.

[Edit]Touring Your Town

1. Plan a special activity for each day and night. Make your long weekend special by pretending you're on vacation. Schedule fun events for each day to help keep your weekend exciting. Look for special events like concerts, parades, and festivals that are happening over the weekend. Additionally, pick activities you might do if you were vacationing in your city.^[14]
   
   • For instance, you might see a movie Friday night, visit a museum and a new restaurant on Saturday, play mini-golf and watch live music on Sunday, and join friends or family at a local park on Monday.
2. Spend an afternoon at the park. Parks are fun because they have playground equipment, walking paths, and attractive nature elements. Visit your local park for a picnic, games, or scenic walk. Make it an even more fun afternoon by inviting friends and family! Here are some activities you might try:^[15]
   
   • Bring board games and play at a picnic table or on a blanket.
   • Kick around a soccer or kickball.
   • Play a pickup game of baseball.
   • Draw on the sidewalk with chalk if it’s allowed.
   • Play badminton.
3. Eat at a restaurant you’ve always wanted to try. Sampling some new cuisine is a fun way to mix things up without having to travel outside your hometown. Pick a restaurant that you’ve never tried before or a place that has a lot of different kinds of dishes. Then, order something that you typically wouldn’t get.^[16]
   
   • If your city or town has limited restaurants, you might order a different entree at your favorite eatery.
4. Visit a local attraction in your city or town. It’s easy to forget about the fun things your city and town has to offer, and a long weekend is a perfect time to remind yourself that there’s fun all around you. Pretend like you’re on a vacation in your hometown and enjoy the recreational activities available. Here are some great options:^[17]
   
   • Play mini-golf.
   • Go bowling.
   • Tour a local museum.
   • Visit a nearby winery or brewery.
   • Walk along a local waterfront.
   • Go to the zoo.
   • Take a painting class.
5. Look for local events happening over the weekend. You never know what fun activities are going on until you look! There might be a movie screening, a farmers' market, a festival, or something else going on in your town that you never knew about—and a long weekend is the time to try it out.
   
   • To find fun events going on in your town, look for community boards where people can post flyers about what's happening. These can often be found in cafes, libraries, supermarkets, or public buildings.

[Edit]Enjoying Your Break at Home

1. Spend your extra time working on a hobby. Your busy work or school week can make it hard to do the things you enjoy. A long weekend is the perfect time to engage in a favorite hobby. Dedicate a few hours over the weekend to your hobbies. For instance, you might do the following:^[18]
   
   • Knit a scarf.
   • Paint.
   • Build a birdhouse or shelf.
   • Write a short story.
   • Play a game.
   • Practice the guitar.
   • Make homemade bath products.
2. Read a book that captures your full attention. Reading can be a great escape, so it’s an excellent weekend activity. Pick a book that you find interesting and engaging. Then, snuggle up with a blanket and warm beverage so you can read in comfort.^[19]
   
   • As an example, you might pick a fantasy, science fiction, or adventure novel if you want to be transported to another world. On the other hand, you might pick a cozy mystery if you want a quirky puzzle to solve.
3. Binge watch a TV show or movie franchise that’s in your queue. Diving into a TV show or movie is a fun way to rest and relax. Best of all, you can likely do it for free. Pick a show that you’ve been wanting to watch or re-watch your favorites.^[20]
   
   • If you like, invite a friend or family member to enjoy a marathon with you.
4. Make a big meal for your family or friends. Enjoying a meal with people you care about is a great way to make memories, relax, and remind yourself what’s important. Invite friends and family to your home for lunch or dinner. Then, cook up a tasty meal or ask everyone to bring their favorite dish.^[21]
   
   • For example, you might host a picnic or barbeque if it’s warm outside.
   • On a cool day, make a big pot of chili or gumbo to share with those you love.
5. Complete a major home improvement project. You likely have projects that you want to tackle but just don’t have enough time to do. Luckily, a long weekend can be the perfect time to get these things done. Choose a project that will help you feel happier and more content at home. For instance, you might do 1 of the following:^[22]
   
   • Clear out your clutter and organize your home.
   • Redecorate a room in your home.
   • Paint a room.
   • Plant a garden.
   • Fix your car.
   • Lay stones for a new patio.
   • Get deck furniture.
   • Build a swing set.
6. Catch up or work ahead on work or school assignments. While it’s important to use your vacation to relax, you might decide to work if it’ll make your life easier in the future. Carve out a few hours in your weekend to take care of assignments or projects that are behind the deadline or to work a day or 2 ahead. However, remember to relax a bit, as well.^[23]
   
   • For example, you might catch up on a reading assignment for school or start working on a research paper you know is due soon.
   • Similarly, you might finish up a presentation for work that needs to be submitted as soon as possible.

[Edit]Tips

• It’s best to plan out your activities in advance so you can make arrangements to do everything you’d like to do. However, try to stay flexible so your fun weekend doesn’t become stressful.^[24]
• Give yourself permission to relax and have fun so you can enjoy your break.^[25]

[Edit]References

1. ↑ https://www.nbcnews.com/better/health/why-three-day-weekend-may-be-better-your-mental-health-ncna908221
2. ↑ https://www.huffpost.com/entry/what-to-do-three-day-weekend_n_591c6698e4b0a7458fa4c364
3. ↑ https://www.jetsetter.com/magazine/long-weekend-getaways/
4. ↑ https://www.travelchannel.com/interests/road-trips/photos/21-popular-cities-for-long-weekend-getaways
5. ↑ https://www.jetsetter.com/magazine/long-weekend-getaways/
6. ↑ https://www.businessinsider.com/how-successful-people-spend-long-holiday-weekends-2017-5
7. ↑ https://www.nytimes.com/2016/12/14/travel/how-to-plan-a-weekend-getaway.html
8. ↑ https://www.realsimple.com/work-life/travel/travel-planning/family-weekend-getaway-planning-guide
9. ↑ https://www.historyplace.com/tourism/usa.htm
10. ↑ https://gocampingamerica.com/
11. ↑ https://www.travelandleisure.com/slideshows/best-beach-weekend-getaways
12. ↑ https://www.nps.gov/planyourvisit/index.htm
13. ↑ https://travel.usnews.com/features/5-ways-to-save-on-a-weekend-ski-trip
14. ↑ https://www.businessinsider.com/how-successful-people-spend-long-holiday-weekends-2017-5
15. ↑ https://www.businessinsider.com/how-successful-people-spend-long-holiday-weekends-2017-5
16. ↑ https://www.businessinsider.com/how-successful-people-spend-long-holiday-weekends-2017-5
17. ↑ https://www.huffpost.com/entry/what-to-do-three-day-weekend_n_591c6698e4b0a7458fa4c364
18. ↑ https://www.businessinsider.com/how-successful-people-spend-long-holiday-weekends-2017-5
19. ↑ https://www.businessinsider.com/how-successful-people-spend-long-holiday-weekends-2017-5
20. ↑ https://www.businessinsider.com/how-successful-people-spend-long-holiday-weekends-2017-5
21. ↑ https://www.huffpost.com/entry/what-to-do-three-day-weekend_n_591c6698e4b0a7458fa4c364
22. ↑ https://www.huffpost.com/entry/what-to-do-three-day-weekend_n_591c6698e4b0a7458fa4c364
23. ↑ https://www.businessinsider.com/how-successful-people-spend-long-holiday-weekends-2017-5
24. ↑ https://www.businessinsider.com/how-successful-people-spend-long-holiday-weekends-2017-5
25. ↑ https://www.businessinsider.com/how-successful-people-spend-long-holiday-weekends-2017-5